23 Feb Keep Your Single Sensors In Tune
Ladies let’s face it, when you finally enter a relationship it is a good feeling. Being able to share quality time with someone who appears to be genuinely interested in you is a big deal. After one encounter you are ready to share details about your new “Boo” to your girls. You secretly wish that your chapter of “Singlehood” is closed and there is nothing wrong with that. But, I caution you don’t rush it. You know how you do sometimes, go on a few dates then begin to mentally plan your wedding. Take it slow, go with the flow. Remember everything appears perfect in the first few dates, therefore you have to keep your single sensors in tuned.
Single sensors are the internal, mental alerts that goes off when you see an eligible bachelor walk into the room and you unconsciously check his ring finger to see if he is wearing a wedding ring. Or that feeling you get when you are walking through the mall and you wonder if he just made eye contact with you or the woman near you. That feeling you get when your crush calls just to say hi. Or when you receive a random text message from that special guy who makes you feel all tingly inside. These single sensors go off whenever a potential mate is in your presence. But, they also alarm you when something just isn’t right in a current relationship.
Don’t discredit your internal, mental alert. Be aware when your single sensors indicate that he is just not that into you or that you should move on. Remember single sensors are not pre-planned and they alarm to let you know there is something going on that you should pay attention to. This alarm can go off at any time during a relationship. It does not matter if it is a new relationship or one that you have been in for a while. To keep your single sensors in tune here are 3 alerts you should be aware of:
- If in the beginning of the relationship he goes out of his way to be with you. Meaning he rushes to you after he finishes a long shift at work. He gives up his night to hang with the guys to take you out. Then gradually he begins to make excuses for not being able to spend time with you. Everyone else is always more important than you. All of a sudden “his boys” and family take priority over you. He barely calls and may send an occasional text. It should be obvious that he’s no longer into you.
- If he is always too busy to have an actual phone conversation but sends text messages instead. Or if he only wants to connect with you via social media and never is available offline. If he only wants to “house date.” Meaning dating in public is not an option. He’s not interested in a committed relationship with you and he maybe involved with another woman.
- If your Spirit is telling you that he is not being faithful to you. Don’t ask him if there is someone else. Asking him a question when the answer has already been revealed to you will give him an opportunity to lie. One thing I know for sure is that the Holy Spirit works on your behalf and it will not lead you astray. When you are in constant prayer and meditation on God’s word and communing with the Holy Spirit things will be bought to light. Once you see things for what they really are it is up to you how you handle it. But, whatever way you choose to react know that you will have to deal with the consequences if you go against the Holy Spirit.
Bonus: You cannot keep a man that doesn’t want you. You cannot convince him to be with you. No amount of sweet talking, dressing sexy, listening to all his problems, giving him money or sex will make him be committed to you. In fact, if you are repeatedly doing these things and he does not reciprocate it… he’s just not that into you.
This list could go on and on. The truth is you should pay attention to the alerts that you get regardless of how insignificant they may seem. Some signs are blatant. If he simply tells you that he is not interested in a relationship with you believe him. That is all the evidence you need to conclude that he is just not that into you and you should move on. Trust your single sensors.
Now that you have the alerts when your single sensors alarm what will you do? Will you continue to pursue him? Will you let him go? Will you standby hoping he will change or will you move on? If he isn’t completely there for you throughout the relationship and you continue to allow his words to supersede his actions then that is all you will get. Remember you accept what you allow.